Project Runway

I first realized she could do it when she emerged from the living room with a squished stick of butter in her hands and a big smile on her face.  Unless she was able to manuever the huge hose on the Dyson vaccuum, the butter stunt meant she could scale the kitchen counter.  And I was right.

The next time (or, what I THINK is the "next time"), I was able to catch her with the element of surprise.  The bar stool had already been pushed across the room, and the baby was standing ON the counter talking to the birds outside the kitchen window.  I didn't want to startle her into falling, so I clamped my lips shut and gulped down my scream. 

Over the years I have learned you can kind of expect this sort of dare devil behavior from small children, because at this age they are formulating thoughts and exercising preferences.  Still, it's a shocker when you realize your baby can actually implement a plan.

The most recent exploit, though, really had me wondering about personalities that accompany these behaviors.  I understand that if the child is hungry, she'll find a way to get into the secured cereal cabinet and dump 3 pounds of Cheerios on the floor, and a few in the bowl too.  I can see how if she wants to make dessert  like the big sisters she'll pull out the vegetable oil which is loosely capped from the last set of Brownie Bakers (who also did not secure the cereal cabinet).  Babies mimic the people around them, which is why in this house no one can ever find their own toothbrush.

But what do you make of a baby who is pleased as punch to have you enter the Hub of the Household to see her prancing up and down the dining room table as if it were Project Runway?

(Un)Frozen Dinners

My daughter's friends were visiting in the midst of a dinner preparation. I think we were having stir-fry or something, and the counter was cluttered with veggies to be cut, and salad to be chopped.

One of the girls exclaimed, "Your family eats so organic!" and I just laughed.  We are far from that. I don't exclusively buy food specifically labeled as organic... I don't go out of my way to shop in specialty stores... I can't incur the expense of higher priced foods labeled as organic... How in the world could she perceive us as organic eaters?

"Well," she said, "you make your own food!"

And then it dawned on me.... she was referring to the fact that we buy very little pre-packaged and processed foods. (And we eat a lot of fresh salads).

This made me appreciate that we are really giving our kids a gift in making our own meals!  Further, they acquire knowledge and skills when they assist us, and their confidence in working in the kitchen grows too.

 And here I thought I was just saving money....

Deep Thoughts

Kel and Andy were driving past our local cemetery when Andy asked,
"Why do they bury dead people in the ground?"

Ahhh... life, death, respect, honor, grief, family, sadness, remembrance.

Kel pondered how to approach answering this question when Andy suddenly answered it himself:

"Well, I guess if they put them in the trees,
they would fall on the cars!"

Wopes

We have endured rain and rain and rain.  Flooded crop fields, muddied ruts in the driveway, running water in the basement... and everyone is affected, especially moms who would much rather be outside with the children.  So when there IS sun on the ground, the kids and I are out the door, usually taking long strolls through our quiet streets mid-morning.

F:  Look at that!  A wing!  In a wee!
G:  It won't fall down.  It has a wope.  The wope will hold it up.
F:   Can you wing on that wing?  Way high?
G:  Oh, yea.  Tires off twactors are good for dat.

"Just Turned" three year old boys love the puddles the rain leaves behind.
G:  I got me fwee wocks!
F:  I got two.
G:  Look how they jump on the water!
F:  Look how they make big wipples!

"Just Turned" three year old boys even know who is home mid-morning and who enjoys their visits.
F:  We want to go dat way.
G:  Okay. 
F:  I want to go see Zosul.
G:  Yea!
F:  I want to get popdorn balls at Zosul's house.
G:  YEA!!!!!!
F:  Then we go over dere.
G:  Okay.
F:  We get dookies and juice at Grammy's house. 
G:  And see the dogs!
F:  And the dat!
G:  And she has twucks!
F:  And dars!
G:  YEA!!!

Most comments from "Just Turned" three year old boys end in exclamation points.  They like to pause and watch a group of landscapers carve out sections of yards.  They like noticing squirrels on telephone poles.  They like listening to the sounds effusing from a water fountain in someone's front yard and discussing whether or not you should drink from it. 

For little boys, taking a long walk, mid-morning, is a good thing after days and days of rain.  But it's even better for moms who need an "out of the box" perspective so she doesn't feel like she's at the end of her wope.

The Candy

The Countdown. 
The Collection. 
The Candy.

So, we didn't have any crazed monsters emerging from hibernation that made my children run like mad to any house with a lit porch light.  However, we still ended up with a lot of Halloween candy.  It's a simple matter of mathematics; amassed candy is exponential with 7 Trick-or-Treaters (even when one is only collecting canned food items for the local food pantry).

Once The Run is done, the kids find a spot on the living room floor and dump the contents of their pillowcases, forming mounds of what will next be categorized sweets... the Gum, the Suckers, the Chewies, the Sours, the Chocolate (ah, if they only knew that this should be partitioned out into "Good Chocolate" and "Fake Chocolate"), the Others, and finally the Icky Stuff With Coconut for Dad.

After bartering and trading with each other, my kids are happy to share their Loot with me, and sometimes they don't even know it.  Afterall, I have easy access to the bowl on top of the refrigerator.  It's a sick secret Halloween desire, but every year I wish the kids would just eat it all that night and thus get  it quickly out of the house. 

I make myself an oath to only have a few pieces of  the "good" stuff (Twix, Payday, Baby Ruth, Kit Kat... Oh! I didn't know there were Snickers with Almonds!).  I swear off the lesser candy.  Really.  But after the likes of the elites are gone, I'll give in to a few of the mini M&Ms, Whoppers, and Twizzlers.  

And that's it.

But long after the costumes have been put away and the decorations taken down, Ziplock bags of candy will still linger in the dark hidden recesses of cabinets and closets. The children will have forgotten, but unfortunately I won't, and eventually I'll finally succumb to the Necco Wafers and the molasses laced confections of Mary Janes and Peanut Butter Kisses (you know the ones... in the black and orange wrappers.)  

It's truly the bottom of the barrel,

And it's creepy down there.